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Use a Coaster or I Will Poke You in the Eye
I don't just ride the crazy train I drive it
Adulting Difficult AF Would Not Recommend
It's not a Dad bod... It's a Father figure
Do you respect wood?
If Zombies Chase Us I'm Tripping You (Nothing Personal)
Be Classy and Shit Use a coaster
I'm Not a Hot Mess I'm a Spicy Disaster
Hit Me Baby One More Wine
Hangovers are Temporary Drunk Stories are Forever
Stay Focused
Feeling Kinda IDGAF-ish Today
Happiness is Toasted Marshmallows
Don't Fuck Up the Table
Chaos and Coffee #mylife
Original Vintage America 1776
Corks are for Quitters
Dream Big
American Muscle
I love Camping Life is Good in the Woods
Whiskey Steak Guns & Freedom
Vodka is Vegan
Place Drink Here Dumbass
Stay Grateful